I want to talk to you about my blanket scarf. How do I wear the thing? It's chunky, it won't fold neatly around my neck. It's not square so I can't triangle it.
On the other hand I love the colours, they are my autumn colours and the scarf is reversible. Yes, it has a gingham reverse. Really, is it for the thrift shop due to impracticality?
Some brave ladies cut theirs. Should I act with recklessness and take the scissors to it?
Then as I stood at Clapham station pondering which way to cut and imagining such rashness a blast of cold air passed through. I grabbed my impractically thick scarf and wrapped it around my shoulders.
That's when I realised what I'll do. I'll use it to keep warm. How novel!